The first step to living a fulfilled life is figuring out what you want. That seems like a fairly obvious statement, but many people fail to really, truly give it thought. We may have vague ideas of what we want and more often than not, we are very clear about what we do not want; unfortunately, we spend much of our time thinking about that. Have you ever really thought about the exact things you want in your life? And I do not mean vague things like more money or a satisfying career, those are pretty obvious. Let's take the career thing for example. If you are less than thrilled with your professional life now, have you ever given deep, serious thought to what you would like to do or have you expended all of your energy thinking about all the reasons you hate your current position? And when I mean something you would like to do, I mean something that you would actually like to do, not some job that you think you should want because it meets societal standards of success, such as being high-paying or having some fancy title.
Some of us never gave much thought to what we wanted and have been living our lives based on what other people wanted for us and other outside pressures from the start. Some of us started out with a clear picture, but perhaps children, financial difficulties or some other issue threw us off track and we got swept up in a life we really never wanted. The good news is, no matter how you got to where you are now, you always have the power to change it if your current circumstances are less than ideal. It may be one of the hardest things you will ever have to do, but if you really want to change, you will have to undergo this discomfort.
Doing what we truly want in life can be difficult for many, and it is for this reason that I feel many people never give it too much thought. It can initiate an uncomfortable process of self-examination, facing up to our faults, taking full responsibility for how our lives have turned out and admitting our unhappiness and dissatisfaction with our current circumstances. Our current life may be less than ideal, but it is comfortable and familiar and allows us to continue being passive and accepting whatever comes our way, rather than facing the difficult challenges of creating our own reality. Living our lives 100 percent true to ourselves, our values and our desires can be scary sometimes, as it requires us to do things we have never done before and step way outside of our comfort zones. You may have to contend with criticisms and changing relationships.
If you are unhappy with any aspect of your life right now, I urge you to explore that more deeply. Why are you unhappy? What do you REALLY want in this situation? Take that time for self-examination, a process that can be uncomfortable but will reap huge rewards when you gain clarity about what you want in life and start taking the steps to get these things.
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